A Quest

understanding reconstructions in life

The Dream

This morning, I woke up with a question in my mind. Why? Why was my dream like that?

I had quite a dream last night, or should I say, this morning. There were two dreams, maybe interwoven together, but I cannot remember how. I can’t remember every detail, but I do remember the major parts.
First, I asked Gizelle via SMS where JJ was. She replied that JJ died two days ago. She wasn’t able to notify me at once because they don’t have phone credits. I was shocked, and sadness engulfed me. I asked why and how he died. I cannot remember how I knew the answer, but since it is my dream, I just knew. It turned out, he killed himself because he’s content with his life. He already achieved all that he wanted–to graduate, be part of the metro con band, to have a good relationship, etc. He was ready to go to heaven. I was taken aback. It was just not right.
I took an illustration to prove that life don’t work out that way. I took an ice block and shaved it into the shape of a bent safeguard soap. The ice can only remain as ice in the freezer. I quoted what C.S. Lewis said, “You cannot be ready for a life here on earth if you’re not ready for a life in heaven.” In this illustration, earth is the freezer, and heaven is outside the freezer. Unless we’re ready to be melted and purified, unless we’re willing to take the shape of our container, Β and unless we let go of our “shape” and blemished “composition,” then we cannot be ready for a life outside the freezer. Giving up our shape and the impure composition of our frozen self is a form of self-denial.
Thinking about it when awake, I realized one more thing. The things that we do here on earth loses it’s significance when we take it out of God’s context. The ice–what we do here on earth–cease to be ice when removed from the freezer–God’s context.
The second part of the dream gives the conclusion. The character this time was James Chiong, a HS friend. One day, he decided to play god–eat, drink, and do everything he desired. A picture of him was taken and placed in a dated document–“the day he played God.” Fast forward to another day, this time, I was the one taking his picture and stamped his document, this time saying, “I am not god, only God is God.”
Overall, I don’t know why JJ and James were the people in my dream. I wasn’t thinking of them when I slept, I was actually thinking of St. Paul and how grateful I was of the great day I had. Nevertheless, God spoke to me through my dream. He uses not only my waking moments to speak to me, but also my sleeping moments. For this, I am really thankful. Grateful, even, for my God who is faithful. I believe that He did this to show His love for me and now telling me to obey His command for me–to write about it and share it. I am blessed and so I am sharing the blessing to others.
He is a faithful God. And He uses every inch of me indeed.

Update: From “To Live is Christ” by Beth Moore
(I studied Day 5 of Week 1 after I posted what I wrote)

“It’s strange, isn’t it? The very thing He finished we can’t seem to leave alone; and the very thing He hasn’t finished, we try to halt. The work of Calvary is finished. No more payment for sin is necessary. He did it all by Himself on the Cross. We can’t earn it. We can’t add to it. It is finished. Yet we try to add our good works to His Salvation.

“However, the work He is doing on everyone who has accepted Christ as Savior is not finished. Salvation is finished. Sanctification is not. Completion is not. Philippians 1:6 promises that ‘He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.’ Yet we wish He’d stop picking on us the moment we’re saved and let us be the boss. Like the Pharisees we wish He’d stop interfering. Give this thought some consideration: sometimes more effort is required to keep rolling the stone back over the tomb than simply to cooperate with the work He seeks to finish in us.” (p.31-32)

I did not want to use the word “sanctification” a while back because it is such a big word and I would like to keep the post as simple as possible. However, sanctification does capture the “melting” and “purification” part I was mentioning in the paragraph above.

Saying that we’re already contented with what we have doesn’t give us the right to play God and decide when we’ll start with eternal life. I would want to reiterate: we should cooperate and allow Jesus to finish the work He began in us.



  Ged wrote @

What a dream about Jayjay and your friend. Thanks for posting. Yeah. We hold on to the work He has started in us until He comes.

  raalk wrote @

Your reply was in the spam folder that’s why I wasn’t able to see it at once. πŸ™‚

Yeah. I have a lot of weird dreams. But only few catches my attention. hehe. πŸ™‚

Just now, I saw an online contact post as her status in fb Phil 1:6 “… He who began a good work in you will carry it to completion… :)” God is reiterating His faithfulness, so I must also be faithful. πŸ™‚

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